Tuesday, March 1, 2011

To blog or not to blog....

I've began writing this about eleventy zillion times, but I don't know what to write.

We're having a little "what is and whats not appropriate to blog about" controversy over here at AVP.

I blogged, and perhaps I shouldn't have. I thought I wrote it in a fair way. I took a long time to write it, making sure I cover all bases. In the end, I thought, it's my blog, these are my feelings, do I not have a right to publish my feelings if that's what I want?

But others felt differently and feel like I wrote the post to cause trouble, felt that I posted things that I had no right to post.

In my defence, sure I posted about other people, but I posted about how these other people (person) makes me feel. My feelings/my right.

The shit hit the fan big time, all the way over to Facebook, where the storm of whats OK and whats not OK to publish continued, and the whole "sticking your nose in others business" became the big issue of the week, and my page was bombarded.

I do understand the arguments presented to me, the whole privacy issue. I think the fact that I have (not very many) followers is the issue. Followers that read and make their own opinions. It'd be OK if I wrote this for me, but this person believes that I blog for comments, for reassurance, and take my comments as gospel. My argument is that this is my part of the world, I need an outlet, simple as that. And my "followers" either know me in real life - and therefore know what's going on anyway, or don't, so why would their judgment bother said person. Sure validation is wonderful, constructive criticism too, and I do read my comments, and I do get sad if there are none. But I'm a grown up, I do know how to form my own opinion. Besides, blog or no blog, do you seriously think that no one gives me their opinion anyway?!

After the shit storm this person went and told people EVERYTHING! how is that any different to me blogging?!

So my conundrum, do I stop blogging? Do I change the way I blog? Do I say fuck it, it's my blog and write what I want? Do I delete AVP and come up with a new one that people I wish to write about will never know of?

I love blogging, most of the time, and my blog is about my life, it's not about my awesome style, or my renovation of an old church, it's not about me and my 15 kids, or how amazing my cooking is, it's just about me. To be honest, while I Love me a good fashion blog, or interior design blog, the blogs I'm really drawn to are ones about real life.

The one that really stands out at the moment is Loris blog where she writes honestly, and heartbreakingly about her husbands recent suicide. She's coped some major shit for revelling too much, but she also gets an average of 20,000 hits! Kate speaks from the heart when she writes, about confidence issues, relationships, travels, food, books, whatever. It's never to "be cool" it's always purely and simply Kate. Margie lost her son to a drug overdose, and never ever sugar coats it. Sara blogs about whatever she damn well feels like. If you don't want to be blogged about, don't mess her around! Sara is one of the most down to earth, honest people out there in blogland. We've read about Summer loosing her father, having a miscarriage, her trials with IVF, we've shared Megs life in New York, her confidence issues and hard times with an eating disorder. We also share the good times with bloggers, weddings, birthdays, new homes, new babies, new jobs, new adventures, travels, dreams, crafts, cooking, new clothes, new hairstyle, whatever.

We share the good times, why can we not share the shit times too? No ones life is perfect 100% of the time.



  1. Girl- you know I back you no matter what. I've had some pretty crap things happen as a result of my blog so I totally know where you are at. But at the end of the day- I think that if you own what you feel, and you're honest when you write.. it'll be ok. If people get upset that's because they are in some straight up denial about themselves and you can't help that. With that being said- if you feel like you have to hold back on here.. move. Start up a new blog as an anonymous person and DON'T HOLD BACK. I think it's important for you to have an outlet to let stuff out because otherwise it's going to eat you up. But be sure to give me the addy so I can follow. ;)

  2. You know my thoughts on this... Better in than out, I say. This place is an expression of you.. Not a reflection on anyone else. Fuck what said person thinks. If they don't like it, they don't have to read it. This is an outlet and with all you have to put up with, it's a much needed outlet. You are not trying to form sides to any arguments or piss anyone off, you are merely expressing how you feel... And that is valid. If you choose to put it out there, good for you! Through honesty and vulnerability comes strength and understanding. Whatever you decide to do is your decision... And your decision alone. Love you girl!

  3. I am really struggling with how judgemental some bloggers and blog readers are lately. I thought the whole idea of having a blog was being able to write about your thoughts and feelings in a supportive environment. Unfortunately that doesn't seem to be the case any more. You do what's right for you. *big hugs*

  4. It's not easy but it's fun. Just write about whatever comes to mind and you'll enjoy it. You'll see.

    You'll eventually find your blogging groove. As weird as that may sound.

  5. I completely agree with Kellyansapansa.

    The way I see it is, if someone doesn't like the content of your blog then they can simply hit the 'X' button and that's it. It's your blog to do whatever you please. You shouldn't be dictated by what others think is right or wrong. You make that decision for yourself.

    :) xx


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